GIVING
OUT GOOD
According to my spiritual guide – a book
called “A Course in Miracles” – forgiveness is the key to happiness. But, as
explained in an earlier blog posting, the Course’s idea of forgiveness is not
as we usually understand and practice it. More about this in a future blog.
Hand in glove with forgiveness is what I call – “giving out good” to
others, or altruism.
Here is another extract from my current book (an unedited work in
progress) – THE WISE OLD MAN & THE KID, A Guide to Living a Positive Life –
where Davey the old man, is sharing his life experiences with Noah, a 15
year-old kid (yep, I’ve aged him by three years, thanks to thoughtful feedback
and persuasion from some of my blog readers). In the book, Davey is a
successful author and is currently writing his autobiography, with the
objective of helping others, especially young people, avoid some of the painful
mistakes he’d made throughout his life’s journey because of wrong-minded
decisions.
“How are you today, Davey?” asked the
kid plonking his fishing gear on the jetty alongside the old man.
“Sensational – but getting better!” Davey replied with a broad grin on
his face.
Noah laughed. “How come you’re so happy all the time? From what you told
me so far, you’ve suffered from depression, setbacks and disappointments all of
your life. And yet, no one would ever guess that given your positive and happy
outlook.”
“You know, Noah, what you’ve just said is music to my ears,” replied
Davey, slowly stretching his arms to the sky after resting his fishing rod
against a nearby pylon.
“Why’s that?”
“It’s good to receive an affirmation from someone else about how I feel
inside about myself.”
“What do you mean?”
“Happiness has been building up inside of me for sometime now. A few
years ago I began to sense that my mindset was beginning to be infected with
happiness.”
“Infected?”
“A figure of speech. Of course the sudden and unexpected loss of my
wife, Laura, recently set me back for many months as I went through the
grieving process. However, as soon as I began to extricate myself from this
profound sense of loss and sadness, something began to replace it.”
“Happiness?”
“Yes. imperceptibly at first, a sense of peace eased into my
consciousness. Then it gradually grew stronger and I experienced increasing
periods of peace and contentment. Then these deep feelings of contentment
progressively expanded into an unequivocal sense of intense happiness and joy.
Funnily enough this was happening regardless of what was going on around me;
regardless of external upsets or problems. This was a durable, permanent
happiness – not vulnerable and incomplete happiness. It seemed to emerge from the core of my
being.”
“Whoa!”
“It was miraculous when you realize where I was coming from.”
“How’s that?”
“All of my life I was a pessimist, allowing – indeed, encouraging - my
negative thoughts and attitude to reign supreme. I now know I sought for
happiness in all the wrong places – externally, of course – in pleasure-seeking
and addictions. However, seeking out good times and self-centered gratification
never produced anything more than emptiness and guilt; and pleasures that
dissolved as quickly as a chunk of ice on the pavement on a hot day.”
“Why do you say you ‘encouraged’ negative
thinking?”
“Good question. On reflection, thinking negatively and pessimistically
became addictions in themselves, and became hard-wired into my attitude. This
way of thinking had become so embedded in and imprinted on my mind, my
immediate and automatic response to events was always to see the bad side of
things, not the good. This close-minded response was designed to lock out the
favorable and positive in order to keep me enslaved with a glass half-empty
attitude, thus denying myself from being happy.
“Of course this self-centered focus, where only my needs counted, shut
the door on my giving any consideration to others. No, my focus was entirely on
my perceived needs. Altruism was never on my agenda. Why should I consider
others and try to make them happy? What was in it for me?”
“What do you mean by ‘altruism?’”
“’Altruism’ is concern for the welfare of others. It’s the opposite of
selfishness. Belatedly in life I
realized the value of being altruistic. Only then I began to understand the
universal law of reciprocity,” said Davey, quickly intuiting that Noah was
going to ask him what ‘reciprocity’ meant. “The law of reciprocity simply put
means - what you give out, comes back to you in some form. So, if you give out
good, that’s what is returned to you. Conversely, give out bad and you’ll get
it back as well.
“I discovered that giving out good also made me happy. It played an
important part in allowing me to release the happiness I’d suppressed inside me
most of my life. In short, I think I’ve gone from a glass half-empty kind of
person to a glass half-full one.”
TO BE CONTINUED
djdelene.blogspot.com
No comments:
Post a Comment